Goodbye Dexter Nails

Hello multi-color nails! It's been so fun since I got you this summer, but now it's time to say goodbye.

You were fun and happy, and many people recognized you from Dexter.

You lasted about 2.5 months.

You helped me "bond" with the grumpy post office lady, which was IMPOSSIBLE.

You withstood many ink explosions and paint splatters quite well. I think I will definitely be getting you again!

Thanks & Toodles. 

Outlander - Brooding Scots Get Whipped and then Must be Bandaged and Sexed

I was just talking about this with my mom the other day— people have been going absolutely bananas over the Outlander series,  especially now that there's been a TV show adaption on Starz.

Below, this is the steamy "lass tending to the wounded man's bandages" scene before the epic sex:

Or something. I actually don't know anything about the book series at all, but I know it's a thing, and Scots are happening right now.

I know they just took a mid-season break until next year, which is LAME. I hate mid-season breaks.

But anyway. Who has watched this show?? How does it compare to the books? I want to hear your opinion.

BARF Gilmore Girls

I TRIED. I really did. 

All seven seasons of Gilmore Girls are available on Netflix now. I'd never wanted to see it before, but there's been such a fuss— I decided to watch the pilot and give it a chance.

It was as bad as I've heard! It was WORSE. I know it has a lot of fans and was super popular, but that mom is terrible. I couldn't get over how immature, childish, and selfish her character is... and she's supposed to be a "cool" mom who's friends with her daughter? Painful to watch. How on earth did they do 7 seasons of this?

I'm guessing the "good girl" daughter is going to have sex and it will be a disaster, the mom will find out, and "Oh my god, how could you?!" and big drama. "I don't want you to become pregnant like I did when I was your age!" Cue moral lesson.

Ok, how close am I? :P

The COOL PART was seeing Jared Padalecki (Sam from Supernatural) so young! And also Matt Czuchry (Cary from The Good Wife). I had no idea they were on Gilmore Girls— surprise, surprise.

Grade: D

Vesti La Giubba - Pagliacci - One of my FAVES

"Vesti la Giubba" is a famous aria from the opera Pagliacci— and one of my favorites. It's been used in so many things, I bet everyone's heard it at one time or another.

The above clip is sung by Franco Corelli. He is amazing.

For those who aren't familiar with the opera, this scene is when Canio discovers his wife's infidelity, but must nevertheless prepare for his performance as Pagliaccio the clown because "the show must go on."

Smiling on the outside, crying on the inside.

If you want to jump right to the aria, it starts at 2:43.

Enjoy!

Peaky Blinders: Cillian Murphy Needs More Sex and a Sandwich

Peaky Blinders is a new Netflix Originals show— Season 1 went live Sept 30th, and Season 2 will be coming in November.

I have been loving Netflix shows lately— so I was totally on board to try another new one! So let's get into it: [SPOILERS BELOW]

It stars Cillian "Cheekbones" Murphy, who is normally gorgeous, but they make him look weird for this show— malnourished and super gaunt. WTH.

I can only surmise they did that because they didn't want his stunning looks to be too distracting.

He's also super grumpy. He's a grumpy criminal person in London, 1910ish, who runs books or something? Anyway, you know it's shady— and the whole family is in it. He's the leader. 

I found the pilot a little confusing... but as soon as I saw Sam Neil, I knew I was gonna stick around: 

I LOOOOOVE Sam Neil, who everyone obviously remembers from Jurassic Park, and more recently from The Tudors. He is the police captain in charge of busting Cillian Cheeks.

I'm so glad he's on this show and getting work, I want to see more of him everywhere. Unfortunately, I never got the feeling his character was ever a serious threat. They didn't give him enough time on screen. 

Instead, we are left to ponder for 6 hours whether Grumpy is ever going to bone the barmaid-who's-really-working-with-the-police-undercover chick: 

Played by Annabelle Wallis, who was also Queen Jane on The Tudors as well. She is the boring love interest who CAN'T sing as well as she thinks she can— was it supposed to be slightly off-key? However she is super badass and is good in fights, no wilting flower. She also manages to get naked with Grumpypants and they have such great sex, his entire personality changes the morning afterwards. 

All this star talent!!! Still, I found this show slightly lacking. It just needed... a little more. More explaining, more backstory, less "this criminal mastermind will never ever be caught by Sam Neil, so there's nothing to worry about," and thus no tension. I will be interested to see what's next in Season 2. 

Grade: C+, but I'm openminded. More sex and food, less singing. 

Your thoughts? Comments below! 

Saying Goodbye to My Nails

After three months of having the most beautiful, pointy, red nails, it was time to say goodbye.

On April 23rd I had my first set of gel nails put on, at Tootsie Toes in San Francisco. What color to choose? I looked at dozens of colors before settling on a blood red— "Can't go wrong with classic."

The process was a blur (a 2 hour blur) and afterwards, I got in my car— GIDDY with my new nails and just sat there, admiring them.

Here are my nails, minutes after I got them:

They have been so awesome, the best accessory ever. I can feel like an evil witch or I can feel glamorous, like Joan from Mad Men. It adds an element of femininity I've never had with my nails— it's like having long mermaid hair.

What was harder to do with long nails?

1. Texting
2. Pushing the seat belt button
3. Getting my contacts out

The first night I had my nails, I could NOT get my contacts out, and I just freaked. "What have I done?!" I figured it out eventually, though.

Here are my nails, after my natural nails had grown a bit, underneath. You can now see my nail beds and "moons":

^This was probably after a month and half. As my natural nail grows, the gel nails grow with them, so they start to get longer and longer— slowly.

I went back to Tootsie Toes to get a "fill." This means they  file down the gel nail a little, strip the old color, and then re-paint. They never actually take OFF the gel nail, though.

This is what it looked like, afterwards. Slightly different red this time:

 


Just like new!

What was easier with long nails?

1. Tickling
2. Typing
3. Running my nails through my hair

I LOVED typing with long nails, feeling the "clack clack" noise they'd make on the keyboard.

Here are my nails in NY:

Then in mid-July, it was time to take them off. My real nails had grown almost as long as the gels, underneath. I had a couple incidents where the gels (now at their greatest length) got caught on the lip of the car door and also when opening a soda. SO painful. I was fortunate that my gels didn't "lift" off.

I made an appointment to get the gels taken off. I had the option to have a new set put in, but I'm going to let my real nails have a few cycles before putting gels on again. Keep 'em healthy and strong.

Taking the nails off took an hour, but was completely painless. The girl was very nice and filed the color off, then soaked the gel off in acetone, then cleaned up my nails and cut them.

Here's the color coming off:

Here are the remains:

I thought my nails were going to be yellow and disgusting underneath, but not really. Here they are, now. You can see the lines where the gels used to be, faintly:

So that is the end of my gels story. I can't wait to get another set! Maybe by Oct? I'm taking color suggestions :)

Goddammit Selena Gomez

I really didn't want to like Selena Gomez's new single "Come & Get It." 

The first time I watched the music video I just sat there cringing the whole time. "Poor Selena Gomez, how did she ever let herself be talked into this embarrassing, soft-racist vid shoot?" 

Ok, that was a couple weeks ago. I accidentally heard it again on the radio a few days ago and I thought it sounded so catchy. Now I've listened to it 10x in a row. I still think the music video is HORRIBLE though: 

Ugh, on a separate topic: Can you IMAGINE her and Justin Bieber having sex? Because I can't.